Saturday, 14 July 2012

When Love is Not Enough

We’ve all heard the saying ‘Love conquers all’, and in many ways this is true. In love, you feel like the mightiest man or person on earth, you can move mountains, jump all bridges and face any adversity standing in your way. In love you say the darndest things, do the dumbest things and are often willing to become a doormat regardless of personal pride. With love your patience defies logic making you willing to go the extra mile. Love makes you stick with someone when circumstances all around tell you not to. Love makes you believe; Believe that everything will turn out alright, your truant child will come good, and the errant spouse will come home. That in itself is a powerful force that can really never be extinguished.
But, is there a time when love is not enough? Is it possible or even fathomable that love, wouldn’t get that partner off drugs, or get your man off the bottle? Can it get the other person to love you back, or get you out of an abusive relationship? What remains of a couple so in love but are unemployed and struggling to make ends meet? Possible disaster waiting to happen, unless someone’s fortune changes quick .

So when is love not enough? Love will not feed the kids, or pay the mortgage. Love may keep you, for awhile, with your partner when money gets tight. But even that has it’s breaking point. Love will not sustain an ill-prepared relationship.

Love will not change those tell tale unchangeable signs you see in the beginning of a relationship; Red flags people, if he is hitting you and can’t control his anger, that’s a no, no.

Love on its own will not resolve the issues with communication; Love is not a mind reader, you can’t tell what the other person is thinking by just staring into their eyes long enough (heart break for ‘Titanic’ and ‘Twilight’ fans). If you don’t express how you feel, the chances are the other person is not going to know how you feel.

Love will not put food on the table or put money in the bank; No matter how much love you profess, if some basic necessities are not being provided that relationship is seriously going to be under-pressure. Financial responsibility is a key factor here. It is prudent to know where or how the relationship would be financially sustained before you go ahead running to the altar.

Love will not guarantee a successful roll-in the sack; Yeah, he looks good, and she swings like Shakira, but there’s still something missing. It could possibly be that you are both basing your expectations on the wrong things (Yep, its time to chuck out that M&B, Cosmopolitan and Playboy mag), and what is needed is for both parties to rediscover yourselves, who you really are, what you want, and what really is important.

Love will not force its way on you, or on anyone. It has to be mutually accepted. It’s all fair, honourable and noble to stick around and not be appreciated, but in the long run the other person has to want you in return. You can’t force that, you can only hope on it. But if you get it back, then maybe, just maybe you’re on the verge of something that really has no limits.

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